Oh Hai!

Murray Farms Corn Maze

Well then. It seems like I have fallen off the face of the earth hasn't it? Well I haven't. Life has just completely got in the way and sitting at the slowest computer on the planet doesn't sound like something I am interested in doing these days.

Things have just been a whirlwind these days. The first month of living in our home we were commuting and hour and a half and two hours respectively. Once we started our new jobs things settled down, but our new schedules are a little hectic with both of us working Saturdays, and split days off seem to be having us running a little harried. We try to spend lots of time with Emma on the days we have with her. We have taken her to the Pumpkin patch, she's experienced her first snowfall and are just settling into our home with all the holiday decor up. We are loving life in our new home and just trying to find the balance finding time for everything. It's hard, but we are making it work.

The house is coming together. If you follow me on Instagram (lil_birdie_emma0701) then you will get a weekly, sometimes daily update of what life looks like around these parts. I am going to try and get a weekly post up over here. That way your all not missing out on things over here, but still can get a taste into our lives. Lil miss is transitioning into a one nap lady, and it tends to be pretty short so getting in a post while she sleeps will be hard. Lol.

Were slowly decorating and fixing little issues around the house, It's a good thing I work in a home improvement store.....and get a discount. My goodness there's lots of things you need when you own a home! We bought an island and a credenza for our kitchen, some shelving and a new rug. We still need to figure out how to make the office/guest room function as an office/guest room before my step mom makes the trip in March. I have ideas so I hope they work out and I hope to do a post when its finished.

New credenza and shelving for the dining room

Were hosting Christmas eve with my parents this year so I am off to research new and easy recipes to make for that. The hubby requested turkey.....so I guess I will me making my first ever Turkey. Wish me luck! Well I think that's all I can think of for this ramble post. Here's a couple of photos!

My beauty watching the bubbles!

His happy place.

Our first snowfall!

I Will Remember You

Today is a difficult day. My father would have been 53 today. A little over 5 months has past and even though each day gets a little easier, I still find myself wishing that things were different. I know that I cannot change what has happened. You never realize how short life is until you come close to losing it. I lost myself for a while. Not knowing where I was or who I wanted to be. Now I know.  I have realized that I have yet to live my life. There are so many things that I want to do and I am making the point to try and do them. They aren't large things like climbing Mount Everest or things like that, but more looking past myself and seeing what is really out there.

I attempt to be less hurt, meaning when somebody does something it doesn't directly mean that they are doing it to me and I shouldn't get so easily offended. Letting things roll off my back and going with the flow. Choosing who to spend my time with. With the death I fear that the hubbs and I lost a little bit. It's needing to get that time back and return to that good place. It's gotten easier, as everybody knows marriage takes work and we both need to work and put in the effort. We both have goals and I am pushing for mine and helping to push him with his. We plan to make plans now. To experience life in all the ways that we can and to do it together. Whether its taking a trip to somewhere new, like Catalina, or doing a new sport like kneeboarding. We want to at least try something new at least once a month. So the bucket list will expand for 2012 to include all the missing things from this year and to attempt to experience life.

Today though will be a restful day. I will listen to his cd Bar Stools and Call Brand Booze and surround myself with positive people who understand me and all that I am. It will be a  peaceful time for my thoughts and to remember all the memories that I have and all the things that he taught me. 

"I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I'm so tired but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
Though we are screaming inside oh we can't be heard

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I'm so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
But once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light

That I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories"

 

I love you Daddy!